Will you leave the mask off?

 

I have been my most naked in the moments that I have allowed myself to be vulnerable.

Recently, it was a decision to participate in a self imposed 90 Day Video Challenge. There is something oddly revealing about watching yourself as you video you.

The first few videos-about 7 or so-I was very aware of how I looked.  Should I reshoot the video with kinder lighting? I came to the decision that I could drive myself crazy with self-judgment. I needed to just do it.

And so I did. Along the way I began to like what I was seeing. It was as if I was falling in love with myself. I saw myself smile and I thought to myself, that this was a woman whose smile encouraged others to smile. I heard my voice and thought to myself, that this was a warm voice and an engaging voice.

As I write this I realize that I have allowed myself to be vulnerable in the sharing of this information. What will people think?

Phttt!  If I cared at this point I wouldn’t have written about it. I took a giant leap into another medium not knowing where it would go. The realization that I could like my smile and my voice is icing on the cake.

I have also been the most naked in those circumstantial moments when I couldn’t gather the wherewithal to put on a mask of civility.

I think that when I gave birth to my sons, I was more naked than the actual act of conceiving.  In the midst of the moments of pain and of anticipation, I could find no entry into that person who could be polite and accommodating.  Anyone who has given birth will probably agree with me.

It was all about me.  It was all about my child.  Everything else was just white noise, shadows of others with us and an unwillingness to take anything else into consideration, until he made his entrance. And then it was all about them and there was such clarity in that first moment when I took them in my arms, that is imprinted upon my cellular memory forever. I can still see their face and feel their fingers grabbing mine. I was claimed and with joy I claimed them.

It is most likely the one time that a woman cannot be anything but who she is in that moment. There is no energy to be anything but a woman giving birth. There aren’t many opportunities like that in life.

However, I have come to know that the more that I allow myself to be with all my insecurities, fears, hopes and dreams without regard for what other people think, I find myself feeling more me. More naked than when I entered the world.  This time I am choosing from a place of knowing that I might be banged up a little, laughed at a little, but I could end up being a lighthouse. Maybe, I will be that safe place for others who are too afraid to be themselves, with no masks in place. Just be in the humanity of experiences on planet earth.  There is nothing to be afraid of but fear. Tis true.

We are naked in grief. We are naked in surprise. We are naked in our joy. We are naked in those moment that consume us with so much emotion and there is no time to put a mask on. In those moments we need someone to hold the space for us and allow us to move through the energies. We need a safe place to be.

There is always a home in your being.  You are not as far away from the safe place as you would think. We are with you, Source is with you in all moments but most especially forces are gathered to be with you in those moments where you are consumed with emotion. It may not feel like it at the time and that is why there are so many of you on planet earth, enough of you to provide the safe places for others who cannot find their way on their own.

You are naked to us. We see everything that you are. We hold no judgment in those moments when you have forgotten. We hold no judgment when you push away the very people that could lead you safely back to you. We understand and we know that you have forgotten and that is all right. We know enough of you to send more along.

Trust that the universe has your back in small and in large things. Trust that it will always turn out to be better than before, even when you cannot even imagine how that is possible.

Trust that in your utter grief that we are close to you and desire for you to remember whom you are and who the other is that you think you have lost forever.

They may not be in your physical presence but when you allow yourself to open your hardened by sorrow heart, you will feel them. You will know that they are still with you. We know that is of little comfort in the midst of it, but in time you will come to that. In time you will meet in dream state and know that all is well.

Even when you wake and you are felling bereft again, we will be there. They will do everything in their power to let you know that all is well. But, you have to be vulnerable enough to trust in this.

It is not  always an easy path. Life on planet earth is filled with intense emotions that will shake you to your core. The only questions we have are these; Will you leave the mask off? Will you trust that Source has your back?

Linda and The Group